My Autistic Life — 04

“Discontinuities” are SCARY.

Richard Crim

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This graph shows what James Hansen thinks is happening with the Climate System. The “Old Model” forecasts are the GREEN line. Hansen is saying that there has been a SUDDEN MASSIVE influx of ENERGY into the Climate System. Enough to ABRUPTLY SHIFT the Climate System into the YELLOW CONE. This JUMP is a “discontinuity”.

In both Climate Systems and Memory.

It took me a really LONG time growing up to realize that I had a “good” memory. I didn’t understand as a young child that EVERYONE wasn’t LIKE ME. I assumed everyone’s memory was just like mine.

I didn’t UNDERSTAND that my MEMORY made me “Freakish”.

As a young child I LOVED this game show. I NEVER forgot a tile after it was revealed and could ALWAYS “match” tiles that had been revealed. It amazed me that there were adults that couldn’t.

I don’t think that I have an “eidetic” memory. At least not in the sense of the Sheldon Cooper character in the show “The Big Bang”.

I’m not even sure how that works for the people who really do have TOTAL RECALL of EVERYTHING they have done in their life. Who can tell you what they wore on every day of their life.

Who they talked to.

What was said.

What they did.

One of my wives had that kind of memory. She REMEMBERED DETAILS to a degree that amazed me. I remember thinking when I first saw her apartment that she was some kind of “packrat slob”. It was JAMMED full of STUFF in a completely DISORGANIZED fashion.

It looked like “heaps” and “piles” to me.

If we hadn’t been tearing each other’s clothes off and about to have SEX. I probably would have left. I grew up in a “hoarder house”. My mother was a MALIGNANT HOARDER and I had reacted to my childhood by adopting a “monkish” austerity and simplicity in my surroundings.

I LIKE “clean” and “organized”. “A place for EVERYTHING and EVERYTHING in it’s place” is a motto that “resonates” with me. I am COMPELLED to “break things down” and LABEL\ORGANIZE/FILE whatever I experience.

My bookshelves are organized by CATEGORY. With each collection sub-grouped into TOPICS and then by AUTHOR. Authors are in alphabetical order from Left to Right, top to bottom, switching DIRECTION from shelf to shelf on the descent.

Do you IMMEDIATELY SEE in your mind’s EYE that this makes a “continuous thread” without any DISCONTINUITY. Because I do.

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Richard Crim

My entire life can be described in one sentence: Things didn’t go as planned, and I’m OK with that.